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Sheltering-in-Place: Day 60

A woman in a yellow dress floats, glowing, in the midst of the curls of her own mind. The text on the image reads  I obstinately force the darkness from my mind.

The text on the image reads

I obstinately force the darkness from my mind.

Yes, I will repeat and hold onto any ridiculous phrase or saying or glimmer in order to put my mind back on a track that I can handle. 

I am a sunbeam.

I am a golden drop of sunshine.

I radiate more light than my mind can manufacture darkness.

I obstinately force the darkness from my mind.

Good things mix with bad things on most days. So many reactions are heightened now due to COVID-19 and subsequent life changes because of it. What would normally be no big deal, can now be crushing. What would perhaps be a nice piece of news is THE BEST THING EVER WHY AREN'T YOU THIS EXCITED, TOO!? 

It's hard to find, let alone maintain, an even keel. 

So, today, I draw myself in my happy yellow dress that I bought to wear to an Endometriosis Awareness March a couple years ago. It reminds me of sisterhood, solidarity, kindness, and dressing up like a bee. (I have more than one bee outfit, although I didn't put on my wings today.) I show myself floating in a mass of my grey matter, and I'm not letting it go dark. I'm texting friends and family. I'm drawing. I'm eating things that make me happy. I'm going to exercise somehow later. I'm not using the past tense today, even though I have no idea how much that matters. It feels right. It doesn't hurt anyone. So, I'm engaging in a small grammar change. Woo!

I obstinately force the darkness from my mind.